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Period of Adjustment

by If So, So What?

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1.
Mistake 02:51
I think I have made a mistake Gather 'round come watch me break I left without looking back Didn't leave time to repair the crack I have over stayed my welcome Don't think that I am ungrateful This kind of living gets to me Being constricted, hard to breathe People squirming around way to quick Took me long to realize Lets not let this sleeping dog lie Need me some self preservation Don't mind this pointless frustration This kind of living gets to me Being constricted, hard to breathe People squirming around way to quick
2.
I'm not worried it's just stressful Slowly sliding downhill Gaining speed, getting shorter and darker How was I supposed to know? Which way I'm supposed to go? Death is real it will happen No changing that It's at the back of my mind always aching and nagging How was I supposed to know? Which way I'm supposed to go?
3.
Been Trying 02:54
I never wanted much, I never got much I didn't understand why people were in a rush When I was younger I thought everything was guaranteed, silly me Now I'm a little bit older And I've grown a little bit colder The speed the years move over and over doesn't leave room for closer And I've been trying To lose my sharp edge It's not working I just keep trying A child like wonder has kept me from growing jaded and mentally numb I fear the more time I spend will keep me outside looking in trying to remember what brought me here. But I've been trying To lose my sharp edge It's not working I just keep trying
4.
I know 02:48
I had some time away, It didn't go as planned Thought this would be a new beginning but I don't know And I know I should go But whats keeping me here I'm soon to out grow Time to stand up tall from the back row And I know I should go Changing my mind was harder then it seems Stuck in the view of old forgotten things Hard to rip myself away Hard to rip myself away And I know I should go But whats keeping me here I'm soon to out grow Time to stand up tall from the back row And I know I should go
5.
Repetition 03:30
The Loneliness gets to much as we click reload hoping to get in touch looking to disrupt the constant flow of these human thoughts we hate and so we click and click trying to find someone to distract our mind in hopes that we can outrun the overbearing thoughts we get from time to time as I trick myself in thinking you could be mind Everyday it's the same The Repetition is getting to me Try as we might we can't show All our thoughts and work and how much we grow The noise I make from day to day makes it easier to push the dark away I'm waiting for that big bad change hand in these stagnant days and in exchange Start doing all I said I'd do In hopes that it would bring me closer to you Everyday it's the same The Repetition is getting to me And I've never been this tired The facts keep piling up and I'm underneath This real world is getting to me Day in day out,day in day out The Repetition is getting to me
6.
Be Awhile 03:14
Show me a familiar face, bones tired from the constant race rust growing inside hard to move, the longer I live the more I have to prove Bring me to a familiar place, had to leave at my own pace You all made coming here worth while but it'll be awhile It'll be awhile, it'll be awhile I think it's my time to go away had to be sure better wait another day My plan flew out the door forced to go down a different path and explore please put away your forced smile It'll be awhile it'll be awhile If you think for a second this is hard on you just imagine what I'm putting myself through people think I'm brave but why am I so scared? I just want to know how my story ends so please out away your forced smile It'll be awhile it'll be awhile Please don't take me leaving as my thoughts against you I had to make a change like I'm not used to before I know if I was correct It'll be awhile it'll be awhile Leaving now, don't know when I'll be back You'll hear from me when my life's back on track Hard to say but the next time I see you It'll be awhile It'll be awhile
7.
Down Here 02:05
In time I can tell if I was right or wrong but time always takes to long snap decisions made at the drop of a hat no time to sit and think Don't really know If I'd do it again or if I'd change what I did but the sad state of current affairs I'd sell my soul for the highest bid I am down here Im a slow learner it takes me awhile excuse me as I build the strength to smile I've never learned from my mistakes How many more will I have to make Living is much easier the more you are unaware The real world starts to pile up and I am stuck under there I am down here
8.
Feeling Fine 03:01
What if I had my 15 minutes and the best is in the past? Curtains closed, waiting to see what this will bring I wasn't done being young, that went by way to fast Instability is the new king I might be crazy but I'm not psychopathic Im on edge I'm unhappy but I'm not pathetic I barley work, unimportant but please don't waste my time I'm not doing well but I hope that you're feeling fine Maybe if I don't turn the calendar page the month won't change it'll all stay the same and you'll all just go away If I'm lucky Something heavy weighing on my mind and that something remains to be defined here come the trails and here comes the doubt getting cut in the throat while on constant lookout I might be crazy but I'm not psychopathic Im on edge I'm unhappy but I'm not pathetic I barley work, unimportant but please don't waste my time I'm not doing well but I hope that you're feeling fine I hope that you're feeling fine
9.
O.K 02:01
"O.K" - Oz Fritz
10.
When my head hit the pillow all those years ago not even aware of how much I didn't know innocents intact dumb to the fact That the big frustration was coming at me fast In my younger days I could happily say I had no concept of living with decay but with my feet in the fire and my face in the mud I chip away with these questions I ask in cold blood I chip away at my calmness and stability I chip away at my life's simplicity Everyone has to deal with The Big Frustration Good luck dealing with The Big Frustration So this is what growing up was about the cushion of youth slowly pushed out Comfort is a myth so I've been told Anger is a gift, the urge to break the mold There's nothing we can do, just let that sink in watch my thoughts out there shaking with the wind We try and we try, we do what we can We spend most of our life's just gripping to a plan It's out of our hands if in luck we are placed or if everything our life meant was just a big waste Everyone has to deal with The Big Frustration Good luck dealing with The Big Frustration
11.
Still Here 04:39
This is the town where I was born I've out grown it But I'm still here As I grow in age it's not the same I've out grown this But I'm still here This is my home, my only home Can't be all that I know, that day will come where I will go But I'm still here I love this town where I was born I always will But I've outgrown it But I'm still here
12.
The plot is getting thickened and the mood is getting dim The dreams are riding high as the cold it sets right in My eyes are surely growing as the current keeps on flowing I hope the sun keeps shining as we keep rowing on and on My shell keeps getting thicker with a look at the whole picture My view is getting wider as a shiver runs down my spine The bench mark is low as it's lacking motivation lets tiptoe towards the line as we throw away temptation The water's getting murky as the mud is getting darker I return to the start with my tale between my legs The mountain top is daunting as the valley slowing crumbles Marching on the path as the shame it sets right in Looking towards the sun my mind screams at the future Eyes burning from the center but I push a little deeper We have so much time with so little to see I hope that we don't die in the deep deep sea The fog covers my eyes as my shoulders cover my ears No louder sound then the creation of fear The walls are surely pulsing as I'm sure the ground is breathing I look up to the sky as relief it sets right in This route is off limits and the lake is on fire Shut the door behind you this is down to the wire The dissonance is growing every day and every second Confusion is the norm as I analyze this wreckage I hope Im not distracting, please stand there in judgement Don't mind me, It's just a Period of Adjustment

credits

released April 1, 2015

For Grandma


Ben Wallace-Ailsworth- Bass/drums/vocals

Mike Sopko- Guitar

Jay Lane- Drums and percussion on tracks 4,7,12


Tunes and lyrics by Ben Wallace-Ailsworth
Aj Hicks- Vocals on Track 5
Produced by Ben Wallace-Ailsworth and Mike Sopko
Drums and Bass recorded by Jay Lane at Luvrzlane Studios
Guitar and vocals recorded by Mike Sopko at the Garage in San Leandro, CA.
Mixed by Oz Fritz at Prairie Sun Recording Studios in Cotati CA
Mastered by Myles Boisen at Headless Buddha Mastering Lab in Oakland, CA.
Art and Layout: Matt '136' Ritchie


Thanks to: My family, The Sopkos, Jay Lane, the folks at Praire Sun, Hamir Atwal, Ryan Long, Ben Levin, Keith Davis, Eric Feingersh, Aj Hicks, Ali Barbiaux, Rob Luizer.

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If So, So What? San Leandro, California

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